Some funny sayings I’ve collected long time ago.
S-m-i-l-e !
You can’t have everything….where would you put it?
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If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one.
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Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
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An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing.
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When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
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A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
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I found a great way to attract money… work!
Curtis D. Tucker
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He stole my heart, so I stole his last name.
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Cheer up, the worst is yet to come.
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Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain
Lily Tomlin
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I’m out of my mind, feel free to leave a message!
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The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there first.
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Be nice to your kids, they’ll choose your nursing home.
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Of all the things I’ve lost… I miss my mind the most.
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Who says nothing is impossible. I’ve been doing nothing for years.
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If The Phone Doesn’t Ring, It’s Me. ~Song title by Jimmy Buffet
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Sir, you are like a pin, but without either its head or its point.
Douglas Jerrold
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I either Get what I want or I change my mind.
Dreams For An Insomniac